Blog post #3 Critique of a business letter

A letter sent by Ministry of Manpower (MOM) is attached together with this post. MOM was requesting graduate in the workforce to help the ministry do a survey.

First, format of the letter is incorrect- it is a mixture of the block and modified block format. If modified block format is used, signature block should be aligned to the right. As for punctuation use, complimentary close and date should not have any punctuation. Mixed punctuation can be used-both complimentary and salutation having comma.

As mentioned, this letter is to persuade working professionals to do a survey. The drafter is not courteous judging from the tone. It is unclear if the letter is a warning or persuasive letter. For example, usage of the pink paper and the word ‘REMINDER’ in subject line being bold and underlined. The letter is not concise with much buffering in the first paragraph without a proper introduction about the objective of the survey being stated. That does not establish MOM credibility well. It should go straight to the point that the participation rate is low and explain the purpose statement of the study.

On the contrary, the drafter does have the audience interest and desire in mind as the potential benefits of winning a lucky was mentioned, though, without the details.

Resolving Interpersonal Conflict

In Your Marketing Solutions Pte Ltd, Jane holds a junior position as the new Marketing executive who reports to Anne, the senior marketing executive. Whilst, Marcus oversees them as the Marketing Manager.

After a few months Jane entered the company, she and Marcus were seen coming and leaving the office together and also eating lunch together. Some even saw them on a date catching a movie together.

Anne felt that Jane’s performance was pretty good for the first few months as she was hardworking and willing to learning. Recently, after been rumoured to be dating the manager, Jane’s work has become sloppy and incomplete. Anne advised her to improve her work on several occasions but her words fell on deaf ears. There were rumours that Jane's change in attitude was because she had her boyfriend/boss to back her up. One day, Jane offended a client with her sloppy attitude and lack of pre-meeting preparation, resulting in loss of a business deal.

When Anne feedback to Marcus about Jane’s recent working attitude and mistakes, he blamed Anne for not guiding her well instead. Anne felt frustrated because of her current powerless position. She can only suffer Jane’s sloppy attitude, increased workload and accusation in silence.

Does Anne really have to suffer in silence?